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Name: Crystal
Location: Manila, Philippines
Gender: Female
Interests: serving my savior, laughin it up with friends, reading about harry and those little baudelaire children, soccer, and skype
Expertise: 'performing arts' so they say
Message: message meEmail: email me
AIM:  perfect fiasco
Member Since:
4/27/2006
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| its been a while! i'm sorry. a lot has happened and i have very little time to catch up. its been 2 weeks and here's a bit of whats happening...
i
was thinking about writing a new entry when it really dawned on me that
no matter what i write here very very few of you will be able to truly
understand. no matter what i say, there is just no way i can make you
get it. i wish i could carry you in my pocket. show you my world. my
life. sometimes i just feel sad that no one is here to experience this
with me. sometimes i wonder how all this could exist and i never even
knew about it.
the
irony in my life never seems to astound me. at present i pretty much
hate teaching theatre. i dunno, something about a ton of time, no
curriculum, no books, planning out of a vaccuum, and not being able to
find scripts leads one to be constantly fighting discouragement. my
lessons are in such disarray, no particular order really. i'll be
amazed if they even learn anything. i would like to believe that it
would be better with proper planning. but we'd all be better off if
they'd please let me just direct an extra-curricular show and teach
that way. the music, on the other hand, (aside from the actual writing
of lesson plans) has been so far so fun. hahahaha, remember that time i
quit music? i'm also teaching flute. bring.on.the.irony.
i saw a show tonight. a real one. at the Philippine Repatory Theatre. called Moose Murders. i
have seen worse... but my general reaction was the "hmmmm..." it was an
odd script to begin with and it seemed as though roles were twisted
even more than the script. the set wasn't bad, the lighting was really
good, props good, costumes some good some not as, wasn't close enough
to see make-up, general blocking decent, most acting decent. i would
like to know what the script dictated and how much of it was creative
license. there were some ify thnigs about the script and some
significant character choices that were the kind that make you think
"WHAT? who does that? what director thought that was ok?" but overall
it was a 6.5 out of 10.
next
week i'm helping with the whole casting of the senior high productions
thing. i'm looking forward to it. i also wonder how much my unbiased
opinion will differ from everyone else. i'll letcha know.
i.believe.that.children.are.our.future. | | |
| i leave one week from tomorrow.
intense.
i can't honestly say whether or not i'm ready for it.
well, no, i could most definitely say i am probably not
ready for it. but that is of little matter now. it will probably be one
of those things i get comfortable with just in time to come home. i
know, right? seriously, i just don't want them to hate me. my campers
never hated me even when i was the worst of counselors. but then again
those kids only had to deal with me for one week. oh, dear... the fact
that i don't know how to be a teacher keeps looming over my head.
everyone keeps telling me i'll be fine but it really just scares me to
death. i only know that i must press on. step out of my comfort zone.
get on with it. for even if i am terrible at teaching, the kids hate
me, or i end up miserable others have suffered far worse for the sake
of the cross. i can do anything through Christ who strengthens me. and
who will please fill in the gaps when i come up clueless. yikes!
and while we're on the topic of being a little freaked out. ok, a lot
freaked out. beulah is a less and less comforting thought. while i look
forward to the comfortable familiarity of my favorite place on this
earth and the incredible friendships of those that serve alongside me,
i feel that i may have again inched my way out of my comfort zone there
as well. in reality i know only how to be a counselor and nothing about
this new position i am to fill. granted, no one
really knows what my job responsibilities are so i can't exactly mess
it up now can i? however, it will find me living under completely
different circumstances as well as independent of that team of core
counselors i'm used to. i think it will all be okay, it just makes me a
little nervous. and i easily become a worrier. this past year has
taught me so much in regards to the unknown future, being out of your
comfort zone, being stretched and most of all how in my weakness he is
strong. strong enough.
its frustrating, this way of living, but i would go through it all
again and again for the incredible blessing of seeing God glorified.
i look forward to keeping you all posted on the adventures to come.
also, i have a new phone number 419-464-9060 that rings from any phone
through the internet to my computer no matter where i am. its a normal
US long distance or local call, depending upon where you are, so its just
like calling normally. if you don't get me you'll get my voicemail.
please feel free to leave me messages anytime!
anyway, this all stems from (pardon the cliché) the reason for the season, our lord and savior, so i wish you all a very Merry and blessed Christmas!
good.tidings.for.Christmas.and.a.happy.new.year.
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| i'm totally going!!! i leave January 1st at 9am out of Detroit. i'm really excited and looking forward to what God's got in store in the next few months. i need to raise $300-400 more a month but i am confident that God will provide. let's get packing!
blessed.be.the.name.of.the.Lord.
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| if you're still checking this site regularly, my apologies! camp got crazy busy and i didn't have the time i thought i would. as you may or may not know i am not in the philippines. the funds just weren't there. and that's alright. if it's what God wanted then it's what i want. as it turns out my dad has been diagnosed with cancer and will be having surgery soon so it ended up working out for the best for me to be around this semester. it was an AMAZING summer and i was able to finish the summer out which was an incredible blessing. i will probably be offered a directorial position for next summer based on some of the events of the last weeks so it has all worked out.
currently i am working at a daycare, lifeguarding and doing odd jobs for IATSE local #24 (stagehand union). living at home has been great and i've been spending a lot of time with friends both from camp and new on my bits of time off. i am planning on going to the Philippines in January but there is still a lot to be worked out with finances. still, i'm not sure there is going to be enough money. and if that is the case then i guess i do not go. either way, God's will.
that's pretty much it for now. short and sweet. please pray that things would work out as God wants. thanks friends!
is.he.not.strong.enough.to.break.me.pour.me.out.and.start.again?
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| there are 2 things that i know for sure... i should be
sleeping and my God is faithful. this is my anthem. forever God is
faithful. its ironic that's my attitude since my jr.high girls won't talk about
anything other than boys and stealing hats, nothing about this camp is
really going well (nor bad, just not well), i think i'm getting sick
(praying hardcore against mono) and i'm officially staying thru the end
of camp. yes, its true, i'm not leaving for the Philippines when i
expected. i'm not saying i'm not going at all, i'm only saying that i'm
not going when i anticipated. its okay though, when its right i will
know. when its right the money will be there. or maybe i won't be going
at all. i don't know about all that. i just know that now is not the
right time. and it fits with how i've been feeling as i've been
praying. i had an idea i wouldn't be going on time. i also know about
saying yes, i'll go and close the door if its not what you want. i do
not think the door is closed yet, so now i hurry up and wait. some more.
please continue to pray with me as i wait on God's direction and seek His will for my life.
forever.he.is.with.us.forever.
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